Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
he accidentally used the toothbrush i use to induce my bulemia...i feel like this is something he shouldnt find out...
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
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