im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Dude, I just saw a bird vs. squirrel fight. A car won.
He uses pillows to masturbate.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
I'd just like to say before I start drinking tonight that not only do I not find you attractive; I don't want to hook up with you, suck your dick, be your "suga mama" or have your babies. Please disregard any texts, phone calls or voicemails that say otherwise..
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Wait an hour then go and untie him. Bring toilet paper and some spare underwear. Want anything from Starbucks?
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
Randomize
