we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
Also cheers for the reminder to check last night's texts. It's been a magical adventure through drunk me's thought process.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
