I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Dude, I need a fuckin wingman and this could finally make us eskimo brothers, how can you pass that up?
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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