I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Randomize
