Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
Four minutes until I can fart!
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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