jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
Like, I can't stand that bitch, but i genuinely hope she gets the help she needs
So you let the Viking explore your nether regions?
Randomize
