idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
i need an iv and a liver transplant
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
Randomize
