love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize