we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I would makeout with my roommate, but im not drunk enough and she doesnt like bacon fat
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
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