yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
That fucking fat Asian kid that NOBODY invited is stuck in the dryer again
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
