I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
