Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Randomize
