***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
