I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
I almost stepped in a homeless mans stream of urine as he was peeing. I love this city.
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I have experienced an excessively hairy ballsack in my mouth...and it was horrifying. I keep feeling it in my mouth now. It's like hairy ball PTSD.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
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