i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
she was mad because i didn't remember our fuckaversary. fuck buddies are getting too demanding..
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
Randomize