Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
You kept going up to guys in plaid and screaming "are you a lumberjack" in their faces
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Randomize
