You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
i'm really sorry, but i'm just not sober enough to make good decisions.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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