She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
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