i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
Good thing I left work early to shave my balls because traffic sucked ass, which I was written up for and my reason on the write was "to close on time, have to shave balls for date tonight". Oh yea, that was a bold statement right there
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
...and that is the first time I've ever wished fewer naked women on someone I like.
I changed his name in my phone to "Irrelevant" last night. Not changing it back.
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
false alarm, still single
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
