He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
And I just want to be like your tongue is not a FUCKING sword
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
Randomize
