you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
Fuck me I smell like cheese
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
Randomize
