Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
yeah, but I wanna be the girl that makes him realize he's 100% gay
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
I know you can't find me. Somehow I ended up on the roof smoking a cig with the strippers that are on break. Way too drunk to deal with this right now.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
