Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
I am 48% hangover, 48% bruises and 2% fingers I'm texting with.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
So much Jack, so little girl.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
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