She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
The president of the frat said he was honored to award me "Best Overall Blow Jobs", free admission to all their future parties, and a $20 gift certificate to Denny's. I'm not sure if I feel proud or if that's just the burrito coming back up...
Also, what are the symptoms of syphilis?
You were a path of destruction, you started with eating half the cake, proceeded by throwing the rest in the sink and dumping water all over it while laughing... then throwing the drunk helmet across the room yelling that you didnt want to wear it... i'd say it was a successful birthday.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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