your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
This martini tastes like the bartender stirred it with his foreskin.
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
the biggest problem in our relationship is that im team edward and my boyfriend is team jacob
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Randomize
