this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Randomize
