just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
