come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
I've got 15 minutes to eat dinner and drink a 40. Four years of college has all been training for this moment.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
We ended up shitfaced at the house after the Super Bowl trying to get someone from Scientology on the phone.
Randomize
