The ticket read "Found nude in a tree"
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize
