as soon as you compare a person to an animal, all sexual interest is out the window
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
I have post one night stand depression
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