1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
Just snuck alcohol into the hospital for my mom.
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
I love you more with every blowjob.
You should write for Hallmark.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
Of course his mom thinks you're nice, she doesn't know you have sex for cheeseburgers
One time!! I like sex and food....
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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