Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
organizing the empties. That sober.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
