before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
You know you hit rock bottom when you make out with a guy named after a cereal.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
is it sad that I can recall my outfits by who took them off?
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
GOT MY PERIOD AND AN INTERNSHIP OFFER THIS IS A WONDERFUL DAY
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
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