make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I was just informed that I have the perfect belly button for body shots... Best compliment ever.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I want to be your penis for a week.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Randomize
