I'm being pulled over???
For what!?!?!
??? I'm in a cab!!!!!
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
your like the ambassador to my penis.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
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