i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
