HIV tests are more positive than that guy
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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