Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
i just woke up to seventeen texts from you saying all the things you would have done for a french fry.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
so much tequila, so little girl.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
I don't think he liked your vagina hand signal
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