drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
It's noon and i am somehow drinking by myself in a jazz tent in broad daylight.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
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