I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
Me and him were fist fighting in the back of the cab and I offered the driver a 100% tip to call him an asshole. I don't know why.
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
SO AWKS THEY ARE HAVING A COUPLE FIGHT AND I JUST WANT PIZZA
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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