he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
I walked in on him fucking her whilst she ate skittles. I saw things no one should see, but I did get your bra back. You owe me.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
