so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
I'm sitting on the couch playing the sims, how's ur night going?
I'm sitting on my floor, drinking wine, and listening to bette midlers "wind beneath my wings"
Why are our lives so predictable?
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
Randomize
