Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
So my best friends wedding ended with everyone seeing me getting eaten out behind the forbes church. Classy!
Randomize
