Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Just found out that wake n bake is not one of the 7 habits of highly effective people..
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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