He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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