I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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