im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
I even got my dealer to make gluten free special cookies ;-)
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
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