well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
lets start a swedish sibling band together
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
She's a squirter....that makes up for lots of other annoying things
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Randomize
