She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
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